My soul

Websters definition of soul is: in certain spiritual, philosophical, and psychological traditions – is the incorporea[ 1] essence of a person or living thing or object.....
Christy's definition::: the little hidden piece of flesh deep inside of the body that holds all the feelings! Now with that said, the soul can grow cold if not shown love, compassion, honesty, and major affection! Let me start backwards on that list I just wrote! Affection: is shown and given in many ways, hugs, holding hands, kissing, and so on! The way affection is shown is how your soul knows what feeling to bring out! Cause you could hug a stranger on the street, and their soul is gonna say see someone does care! If you hug a potential lover or friend then your soul is gonna say she/he's the right one or back away cause pain will follow! Now this piece of flesh called soul is what helps your heart and brain decide to pursue a relationship or just walk away and never look back! Next on my list is honesty, its pretty self explanatory meaning that you don't lie about anything you do or say! If you say it then make it happen! Next is a big deal for some people and its called compassion! Compassion is something that lots and lots of people don't know what compassion is! So to help me out I checked ol' Webster's dictionary and here's definition:::: a virtue — one in which the emotional capacities of empathy and sympathy(for the suffering of others) are regarded as a part of love itself, and a cornerstone of greater socia nterconnection and humanism — foundational to the highest principles in philosophy, society, and personhood. The part most people struggle with is the empathy and sympathy in the suffering of others! The reason why the struggle is because they haven't been shown it! That's all about those that I have to say so on to the last one! The biggest of them all! LOVE!!!!! Love is universal, its in every country, religion and every person! And that's where the soul comes in! It helps you show love the way it needs to be shown! The soul isn't complete until 2 or more of those things are in your life and your soul and your heart will begin to beat to the same tune! Its like this, when ones playing in a key of "c" and other one is singing in key of "f" then the sound they make isn't joyous its rather a sound that's hard to describe! Only a couple times in my life have my heart and soul been one! When I first laid eyes on my grandmother and was old enough to know,9 yrs ago When I married Corey, 5 yrs ago when I met Missy and lastly about a month ago when I met Natasha! My grandmother left me Too early, Corey just quit showing all the things I needed, Missy im not really sure what happened! Then Natasha came along and before I ever heard her voice or laid eyes on her my heart and soul started singing the most awesome tune I've ever heard! Then I laid eyes on her they both started beating a huge drum! But I must say her past caused her to freak out as she out it and caused her to want to slow down! My heart shattered in to a million pieces, my soul fell down and a piece of my heart split it open! Cause I knew that others before her left me empty handed! They left me wanting more they left me feeling worthless and useless and like nothing I had physical, emotional or mentally was good enough for them! And that's exactly how it made me feel that very day! Now I've sense gotten a good understanding of Why and reason behind the need to back away! When she explained I realized that I was just being me and she truly didn't know how to accept it! I guess people are so mentally and emotionally abused that the blocked that part out! But im who I am and im not changing! She knows that, Corey knows That and so does Missy! Maybe im too much to accept! Maybe all the love, compassion, affection and attention that I've lacked all my life is too much for others to accept from me! I may never find the true person That completes me Like she did! But I gotta accept that she's not ever gonna be able to be who she truly is! We might have to Be "secret" Lovers for the rest of our days here on earth! But if that's the case ill accept it cause I believe she's the perfect match for me! Contrary to what she says I believe she is!! Never does a minute go by where she's not on my mind, never does a minute pass That Corey, Missy or my grandmother not walk thru my memory! They'll forever be etched in my memory but as I've said before that's another chapter closed in my book of life! But all chapters closed molded me into who I am today! A proud bisexual female! Blog I must close can't see to type anymore! Peace