Words speak meaning!

As I lay here in this bed, head pounding and heart racing! I keep telling myself to go to sleep! I just wish when I closed my eyes that I could fall asleep! But instead I think about my day, my life and my mind races like a speeding train running down the track out of control! Its gonna crash one day and I Feel that days coming soon! Life's too short to Take words that people say and twist them around! Someone told me they'd always love me and I responded with my feelings! What they said next really blew me away but I hope that maybe I just read it wrong! But anyways blog its not about those words or any words spoken by anyone in my life this blog is about words period! I never in my knew that the words I speak to someone/anyone could mean more than the actions That follow! I've always heard actions speak louder than words but im learning slowly that truly words speak louder than actions! It takes a lot for a person to realize that they have a problem AND it takes some words to prove to that person They have a problem! It took words for me to finally see that I need help and it also took one lonely action to put those words in to action! I've finally seen the bottom and im slowly climbing up to see the open space! It took almost 10 yrs to see that rock bottom was coming quickly and That if I didn't slow down I was gonna hit face first! Sometimes rock bottom is best place to be! At times I feel I've seen this place before! Its time to seek the help I need and finally find the right path to take! Never has the thought crossed my mind That I'd admit I have a anger problem or depression problem and Never have I ever dreamed I'd be considered bipolar and told I needed to stay in the hospital for days for help! I hope that thru my actions others around me that might feel they need help too will see That it takes a strong person to finally seek it out! My mind is messed up, my heart is hurting, my body is aching but one thing that keeps me going is the fact that im truly somebody! Im somebody that has a purpose in this world and im somebody that has to find her way of dealing and coping with certain things! Blog the words I write mean nothing to lots and some will read and think im talking about them only one time did I refer to anyone but myself! This blog is totally about me and how my words have hurt others and how words have hurt me! Good night blog until next time! Oh by the way!  Giants are champs!