Long time ago

I started this blog as a way to vent my frustration with the world! Not very many ppl read it and not very many should cause I spare no ones feelings I speak my mind and from my heart most of the time! I've decided that something's are better left alone and something's are better left unspoken! It seems odd to me that we used to talk daily and then all of a sudden you just quit talking to me! Hmm maybe it's something I said or did I don't know and right now I don't really care cause your not really a friend if you only talk to me once every 3 months! I mean we talked every day and some days we hung out together but I guess there's other fish to fry and other fish in the sea! It's time now for me to delete you from my phone and when that's done I've official deleted you out of my life! Maybe one day we will meet again but until then hope you enjoy your life and remember you did once have a friend in me but now you have nothing in me! So long to you! 

Life is about making hard choices, living on the edge and sometimes flirting when your drunk! Yelp that's what I did tonight and whew I almost had her but I guess it's best to be friends and not ruin what friendship we do have! A year ago a person walked in my life looking for an experience and got scared and ya know we've formed the best friendship any girl could ask for! Although tonight I almost broke that friendship and almost became her experience! Whew proud I ran out of drink before that unfolded cause a friendship is more important than a one time fling! Well it's time to go to bed my body hurts and I really wanna just sleep! Good night world! Peace!

Where oh where to begin...

Days go by that I think you know I wish I could do this or that! But one thing that I really wish I could do is talk to my grandmother one last time! Just listen to her sweet voice tell me she loves me and let her just talk about what ever! I've been talking to her a lot I know she hears but I want to hear her! As the days get shorter and the nights longer I find myself looking at the sky for an answer! But I don't see one! One day I will!! 

I've been searching for a "friend" just ain't seem to found her yet! I guess it's just not meant to be which is good in a way and bad in a way too! I want someone that I can hang out with and go places with without Corey thinking something is going on! He swears that I've got someone on the side when I don't! I ain't been with anyone since back the beginning of the summer! I just don't really care about the sex part it's other things I want this person for like just holding me, cuddling, laughing, listening to me bitch and just being a friend! I mean I have lots of friends but I need more than just that, I need someone that understands when I need to complain and understands my complaint and just doesn't say oh I know or i understand cause really unless you live in my shoes then you really don't understand! But anyways if your reading this and think you know someone or you are that someone then please let me know! Cause I need a hug right now and no one to hug me! Anyways blog I'm gonna cut this one off right here! Forever and always Peace!

What if...

I stopped for one day and walked away from my phone, Facebook and just watched tv or laid in bed and read! Do I think I could no because this phone is my life! Some days it brings me joy, sorrow and pain! Other times I don't know why it's my life! Today I went to a funeral for a man that I didn't even know but you know I knew his wife and one of his kids! It's the little things in life that sometimes we most stop and appreciate more and more! Never have I ever thought about it as a end to one thing! But you know as its been said life is short and when The Lord says its your time to go you will go! When he's ready for you! But until then you know you might as well continue to try to live on your own and do what you feel is right! I hope that I've walked the way The Lord wants but I know I haven't always! But you know we all sometimes back slide! Enough of that! 

The grass is dying slowly on the other side of the fence because I've realized that my husband has stood by me when I needed him and has tried to help me anyway he can! And that I truly need to stand by him! I do love this man and wish that I had more to offer! But I don't! Anyways I'm headed to bed! Peace