life!

Nobody told me life was this hard! I just don't understand why the smallest things in life cause us so much heartache and pain! I don't know about you but death is heartbreaking! I had a good day today, inspite of the rain it was good! I feel like that she was look down at me today crying with me because it was pouring down when I got there! Aunt jeanette was a very good woman, lived a fairly decent life! Just living like she had no cares and didn't really give a damn about what she said! I feel like I need to get a few things off my chest! I feel like today it really hit me! It really made me feel like I didn't want to! I kept telling myself that it just wasn't true until I actually saw it! I'd like to take the time out to tell a special person to me thanks! Kiersten, it meant the world to me that you was willing to go with me! Thanks so much! I'm sleepy so gonna close this blog! Good nite!

saying good bye

Its the hardest thing anyone would ever have to do! Its not easy to say it when u have the chance and its really not easy when you wasn't given the chance! Tomorrow I'm traveling back home with my new friend kiersten to say good bye to my aunt! Its not the way I want to but its the way I have too! I miss her dearly, when I moved away in 2001 it hurt her more than it did anyone! She knew I needed to go better myself but didn't want me to go! Its not until they are gone that you have all these should ofs, could ofs! Its little things like the time corey couldn't remember her name and called her gredty! She laughed we laughed! The last time I talked to her I said that to her! She is probably told everyone in heaven about it! Shell see Me there tomorrow and probaly look down at me and say there's that damn christy! Finally found the time to come say good bye! Big city living done got to her! I love you aunt jeanette! Your the aunt that I always looked up to! Gredy, never think that I didn't love you cause I did! Well, its bout that time that I close this blog! I'm crying and need to have my butt in bed sleeping! Good nite! Love to all!

sometimes in life

Since the last time I wrote in this blog I've had a death in my family! Unfortunatly I was at home when she died so I didn't get to say good bye! The one good thing that has happened is that I have gained a great friend! I love spending time with her, she makes me laugh! She makes me smile and forget about all the bad happening in my life right now! Thank you kiersten for helping me out of the slump that I've been in! Without you I'm not sure that I'd still be pushing on like I am! My family, you and my facebook friends have supported me so much that I'd never be able to rethank you all! So thanks to all for the loving support you've given me! Kiersten, you came in my life at a rough time but you helped me thru it all! My step grandfather is in the hospital with lung cancer! So I'm trying my best to make the best of it and not think about the death that's about to happen! I don't want him to go but I feel like he's ready so I'm ready! Good nite blog! I love you all! Thanks kiersten I love you too! Thanks family and friends! I love you all too!!

friends

Over the past few days, I've come to really enjoy the time I've spent with my new friend! Its been so nice to have someone to talk to! Someone to listen to my feelings! Its been a true blessing that she came into my life! She's helped me move on without looking back! Now, times are tough for us but that's life sometimes! I've had to pick the pieces of my heart up! Its still scared and probably will always be! Thanks! You've been a great person! Thanks for the time we've had with a few drinks! I love beer but it don't love me! Well good nite blog! I must roll over now!